Archive for January 17th, 2007

The Alice Chalmers Caper part 3

I called my husband on the cell. A very heavy sigh issued forth from the phone. Upon his arrival I was prepared for the tirade I must needs endure as a matter of consequence. After all, it was technically my fault and I was determined to maintain my cool and humbly, with humility, accept his contrition. He had asked me to walk the ENTIRE trail first.
However, any human being can only survive just so many deep heavy sighs, under the breath mutterings and shoutings, “I TOLD YOU TO WALK THE TRAIL FIRST!!!. I mean did he really think he could make me feel like anymore of an idiot than I already felt? No longer able to stand the verbal onslaught, I launched my own verbal defensive arsenal. One loud and derisive comment led to another and before I knew what was happening, I was left to tote the battery the 900 yards back to the shop. Heat, briars, and the dead weight of the battery began to fuel my own anger. So, 10 minutes later when hubby comes meekly walking back to me, appologizing for his behavior, offering to take the battery from me, I am suddenly taken over by a demon and snarl that I am totally capable of doing this myself and anyway I am never going to speak to him again. (It was a very stupid demon) I would think that after almost a 1/4 centry of marriage, I would cease to feel the need to, “make a point”. The only point I ended up making was that stubborness  begets trips to the chiropracter. Later in the evening that wonderful, thoughtful and wise husband of mine, carried a fully charged battery out to the field, started her up and using the bucket and rear wheels, climbed forward, almost straight up and out. Mean while back at the house even though my two year old had been warned not to pick the cat up by the pointy ends, nor the part that looks just like a handle, miss Kitty still had to remind him of our lectures. His lesson was sharp, to the point and most unpleasant. I consoled him and reminded him that some lessons just have to be learned by experiencing them.


The Alice Chalmers Caper

I was feeling quite smug and indignant about my husbands attitude, (and tone of voice), when out of nowhere a huge, new and uncharted canyon appears on the landscape!. Of course I had been remaining very alert, except for a few moments of what I thought were justifiable back patting, (nearly broke my arm). I reacted instantly! But large, old farm machines with delicate dispositions don’t respond in the same manner. I stood straight up on the brakes and the clutch, praying to stop in time. Miss Chalmers, (what I call her when I am displeased with any of her behaviors), had other ideas. She slid, as if on prupose to teach me a lesson for not obeying her masters directions exactly, (I think she’s jealous), straight down into the canyon. Well technically it was a ditch, but lets not argue over semantical choices, ok? After trying various tricks hubby had taught me , and eventually draining the charge from Miss you know who’s battery, I took a desperate measure! I called my husband on the cell phone. Find out tomorrw how this incident resolved itself.

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January 2007
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